My Lords, I shall speak on Amendment 183 in my name. As I said in my explanatory statement, my amendment,
“would require the Government to provide information on the evidence-based differences between the motivational drivers of different types of abuse.”
Clause 73(2)(a) covers the range of behaviours that amount to abuse. We have, thankfully, moved a long way from thinking purely in terms of physical violence and there is welcome recognition that non-violent abusive strategies inflict profound psychological harms. These include but are by no means limited to: imposing isolation; stalking; subjecting partners to public and private humiliations; taking over all control of finances, social life and family matters; and often forcing compliance with those and other abuses by threatening, if not actually perpetrating, violence. I would expect those issues and many others to be covered in the guidance under subsection (2)(a).
However, what also needs to be included—hence my proposed new paragraph (c)—are distinctions between the different types of violence, which are essential for planning nuanced and effective interventions. Indeed, many social scientists consider that it is no longer scientifically or ethically acceptable to refer to domestic violence without making the type of partner violence clear.
Four types of relationship violence have been extensively recognised in research: coercive controlling violence—also known, more evocatively, as intimate terrorism; violent resistance; situational couple violence; and separation-instigated violence. While every form of abuse is completely unacceptable and the responsibility always lies with the perpetrator, it is essential to hold a relationship-based understanding of domestic-abuse intention along with the fact that abuse is a criminal act. We need to recognise the drivers of abuse as well as ensuring that the police and courts have all the powers they need to hold perpetrators to account.
A relationship-based understanding challenges the notion that abuse always stems from a power dynamic within couples, which typically means the male partner is seeking to control the female. In other jurisdictions such as the United States, policymakers have taken on board research from, for instance, Professor Michael Johnson, Professor Nicola Graham-Kevan and Professor Nicky Stanley, which has exposed the diversity of underlying motives. They emphasise that while male domination and coercive control are important elements of intimate terrorism, which occurs in 2% to 4% of heterosexual couples, and in what Stanley refers to as a sizeable minority of same-sex relationships, situational violence is the far more prevalent form, occurring in 12% to 14% of heterosexual couples and termed “common” by Stanley in same-sex relationships.
In situational couple violence, the violence is situationally provoked as the tensions or emotions of the circumstances that a couple find themselves in lead one or both of the partners to resort to violence. Conflict leads to arguments, which escalate to verbal aggression and ultimately to physical violence. It can also be perpetrated, say, after a bad football result and a lengthy drinking session. Johnson argues that the perpetration of situational couple violence is roughly gender-symmetric, and as likely to occur in same-sex as in heterosexual relationships. Typically, rather than a power imbalance, it occurs when one or both partners are struggling to control their emotions. However, even when violence is mutual, women often fare worse because they are physically weaker. It is terrifying to
be a child in the middle of a physical fight between their parents. Through its threats to the child’s caregivers, all violence and abuse between parents profoundly threatens a child’s sense of safety.
A typology of violence does not downplay any one form of violence—it all has to stop—but understanding what is driving it will help that to happen. However, treating all violence as the same freezes out the possibility that some partners, where there has been situational violence, can safely stay together with specialist relationship and other support. The viability of providing specialist relationship support for couples where there is situational violence has been thoroughly researched by trusted providers such as Tavistock Relationships. Again, without victim-blaming or perpetrator-absolving, it points out:
“It is extremely rare for services to identify and respond to the dynamic processes within the couple relationship and other important contributory factors that influence the prevalence of inter-personal violence.”
There is UK evidence that the relationship-focused parenting intervention Parents as Partners reduces violent problem-solving. This and other approaches, such as Sandra Stith’s joint couples therapy in the US, give couples the opportunity to work together on their difficulties and help them to establish better ways of dealing with stressors in their relationships. This is never about forcing victims to stay with violent partners; blame lies solely with the perpetrator.
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However, if victims want the relationship to endure but the violence to stop, risk-managed specialist help should be available. That said, relationship support for both partners where there is coercive control is profoundly risky, as the perpetrator will seek to manipulate the intervention. In summary, I am asking the Government to make specific mention in the Bill of the different types of violence and other abuse. The different motivators behind them require different remedies if cycles are to be broken in individuals and families.
I speak also in support of Amendment 180, introduced so effectively by the noble Baroness, Lady Meacher, because it is essential to the comprehensive set of solutions which flow from the relationship-based understanding of domestic abuse that I have just argued for. It is also essential to the preventive paradigm I argued for earlier when speaking to Amendment 167. The emotional vulnerabilities that many victims, perpetrators and the people who are both bring to relationships must be addressed if cycles of domestic abuse are to be broken and abuse prevented over the long term. Childhood experiences are key to understanding these vulnerabilities. Evidence suggests that the most powerful contributors to domestic abuse in our society are rooted in the relationships people have and are witnesses to when they are young. These never excuse, but they help to explain.
A strategy to prevent domestic abuse, as I outlined earlier, must include help for children to have positive relational experiences right from the start and to help them to develop the skills for these. If children are already exhibiting signs of relational dysfunction, such as aggressive or manipulative traits, action on this cannot come too early. Involving parents, who may be sowing these traits into them in the examples they provide in their own behaviour, is essential. Even if
they have not picked up those traits at home, parents need to know how to encourage the right behaviours and discourage those which will harm their children and others, potentially throughout their lives. This help can be delivered in schools or in family support hubs—indeed, some hubs are based in schools.
This amendment also mentions marriage, the relationship form that most young people aspire to and the family context for raising children where abuse is statistically least likely to be present. Various studies and ONS statistics suggest, first, that domestic abuse is more prevalent in cohabiting relationships than in married/civil partnership couples; and, second that it is more prevalent between divorced or separated couples than where relationships are intact. The act of marriage does not, of course, vaccinate couples against violence, so compulsory preparation before entering this solemn, lifelong commitment makes a lot of sense, particularly if it helps to reduce levels of relationship dysfunction such as abuse and breakdown. This is important, because children growing up with unrelated adults, especially adult males who move in after their parents break up, are statistically much more likely to witness or experience abuse and violence than those who grow up with both biological parents.